Week Eight: Team spirit

Athletics- Road running and Cross Country Running

The day arrives.

The sweat, blood and tears it has taken to get to this moment. The time, money, energy, sacrifices. Everything has been building up for this one short day.

I’ve never been good at sports, NEVER. I was never in a team, never excelling at P.E., I couldn’t even go for a run round the block. I still can’t. But supporting at  a sports’ event, that I can do. 

The excitement built in me, the nerves built in my family member taking part in the sports’ event. The days ticked by until the event. Plans were put into place, bags were packed, flags were made, miles were travelled.

And then…

We cheered, we jumped, we shouted, we smiled.

The flags were waved, steps were climbed, necks were strained reaching to see the event.

And I loved every second. 

I felt nervous, excited, happy. But most of all I felt proud. Proud to be a part of something, proud to feel the meaning of team spirit- what it feels like to support something, watch achievement unfolding in front of me. I never took part in sports at school, but I can’t remember supporting it either. Maybe I felt I couldn’t if I didn’t take part but this event taught me the opposite.

I can feel part of a team spirit, even if I’m not going to be the next Olympic athlete myself. 

So week eight’s lesson? 

Go out there and support your family or your friends or any other sporting event so you can feel part of the exciting, nerve-wracking, overwhelming phenomenon that is team spirit. 

 

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The hardest par…

Quote

The hardest part about growing up, is letting go of what you were used to; and moving on with something you’re not.- Anonymous

 

It’s hard letting go. This attempt at a journey back into my childhood stemmed from just that. I couldn’t and still can’t let go of who I was when I was child- someone who worked hard to achieve great things, someone who had dreams with no limits. Yes, I tried to be an adult too fast and never lived my childhood in as childish way as possible. But I now realise that I did live the part of childhood that involved dreaming big and achieving big fish in a little pond status.

But this world is one very big pond. 

And maybe it’s time for me to realise that and let go. Let go of who I used to be, the highly-achieving, dream-making chid. Because that’s exactly what I was- a child. With childishly-big dreams and child achievements. Life has got in the way of blogging recently, adult life. I work full-time, I live away from my parents, I have bills and responsibilities like most other adults. So why do I expect to move on with this and yet not let go of the disappointment linked to not having that childish part of me still around? 

Visiting family recently, I noticed something a little sad but interesting at the same time.

We had all changed.

Our own lives had started to shape us in ways we could never have predicted and didn’t realise ourselves until faced with each other again. And this is why I found this quote so apt. It’s hard growing up, realising that you’re not the same person you were a few years ago. What has more of a profound effect, is realising your family are not the same people they were a few years and the dynamics of family relationships aren’t going to be the same after time apart. This is not to say they’re going to be any worse, but they will be different. 

So week six of learning to be a child isn’t going to involve sticker books or sweeties. Week six is about learning a valuable lesson that I feel I’ve never truly understand until now. Being a child involves learning such lessons all the time and, this week, I’ve learnt one of them. I thought I was a grown-up when I was just a child but, in reality, my thoughts and dreams were still always child-like. So maybe I wasn’t so grown-up after all? 

Week six’s lesson is summed up beautifully by the quote- I’ve learnt to let go. Just like children don’t hold grudges, forget easily and move on, i’ve learnt this week that I need to let go of the past. Let go of what I was used to, be that in relationships, in personality or in appearance. I need to move on with who I am now and make dreams that have a place now, not follow the dreams of my 13 year-old self. 

It’s the hardest part about growing up but, if mastered, it’s the part that gives you true freedom for your future. 

Daily Prompt: All Grown Up. But too early?

I can’t remember the first time I felt grown up because I chose to live my childhood in a way that was as grown up as possible. It was great at the time- I felt responsible and independent. But as I truly grew up (in the sense of physically reaching ‘adult’ ages), I felt like my growing up had already been done. So I wanted to ‘grow down’ if that could ever be a phrase!

And that’s why this blog exists. To document my journey to not be “all grown up” but, instead, to find a way of seeking the childhood part of my life that I sometimes missed the first time round.

Maybe some of you can remember growing up when you first bought a car or a house, first got a full-time job or got married. But for me I think some of these milestones that I haven’t reached yet, will pass by without this sense of ‘growing up’ because I’ve felt that way already for as long as I can remember. Maybe that’s a good thing- I won’t be too overwhelmed or be tempted to run away from such things because I feel partly prepared already.

But maybe some of the fun in taking these steps lies in the ‘change factor’. The idea that parts of your childhood are changing into adulthood and this change adds excitement, anticipation and a sense of achievement. So if I’ve skipped the childhood part already then could I be risking missing out on the excitement of this change into adulthood? Maybe. Which makes my journey to be a child again all the more important.